:: chapter two ::
“Antoine, Trotter, Colby,
Adair…they’re all dead.”
They were the hardest words that Taylor had ever had to say. He’d been hoping for hours, ever since he’d woken up in the escape pod, that the entire crew had survived the crash – however remote a chance that might have been. Now, though, reality was crashing in on him.
He was alone, stranded on some nameless moon twelve light years and trillions of miles from home – and there was only one other person in the universe who knew where he was or what had happened.
Taylor, I am so sorry.
“It’s okay. Thought this was what might have happened.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “I…I don’t know what to do, Meredith. I don’t even know if I can keep going. They’re all gone. Every single one of them is gone, all except for me and Captain Aya.” He buried his face in his hands and let out a quiet, shuddery sigh, in an attempt to keep himself from breaking down completely. “Fucking hell. What the fuck am I going to do now?”
You’re going to keep moving. That’s what you’re going to do. You’re still alive, and so is your captain – let’s keep it that way, yeah? You can grieve later, but right now you need to keep moving.
“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.” He swiped a hand over his eyes and drew in a deep breath. “Okay. I’m gonna keep looking for the rear medkit. If nothing else that should help keep my mind off things.”
I know I’ve been saying this a lot, but good luck. Got my fingers crossed.
“Appreciate it,” he replied with a small smile, and resumed his search.
Not even ten minutes later, in a repeat of his earlier success in finding the distress beacon, he found something else he hadn’t been looking for.
“Okay. Time to play the good news slash bad news game again,” he said as he rocked back on his heels and stared at his newest discovery – one that was so much better than a medkit any day. “You’re never gonna believe this.”
Oh, I don’t know. Try me. A pause. I’ll probably regret it, but give me the bad news first.
“I couldn’t find the medkit. Got into its cabinet easy enough, but the medkit wasn’t in there.”
Damn it.
“Yeah. I’m thinking someone took it out before the crash but forgot to put it back when they were done with it. So it’s probably still around here somewhere.” He squinted a little, thinking. “So it’s part bad news, part good news?” he hedged.
What’s the good news?
“Turns out that the Varia had two medical stasis pods on board. One of them’s a heap of scrap metal and therefore is zero use to me, so that’s more bad news, but the good news is that other one is still intact.” Here he grinned, once again not caring that Meredith couldn’t see it. “And all its functions have a green light!”
And you know this HOW, exactly?
His grin got bigger. “Found a portable generator.”
No way!
“Oh yes. It’s small, but it’ll keep the stasis pod running for days. Pod isn’t going to heal the captain, but it’ll keep her stable. That’s all I care about right now.” After a second or two, he added, “I mean, what I really want is for her to wake up, but right now I’ll take what I can get.”
He rose up out of his crouch and studied the stasis pod. “This thing’s going to be a monumental pain in the ass to haul all the way back to the flight deck, though. Same with the generator. Pod just on its own is as long as I am tall. And I’m not exactly short, so that’s saying something.”
But at the same time moving the captain to the pod isn’t the best of ideas. You need to make sure she doesn’t lose any more blood than she has already, and that means she needs to stay put.
“Yeah. That’s a good point, actually.” He frowned, thinking. “I wonder…”
What are you thinking?
He didn’t answer at first, instead focusing all his attention on the LCD display on the front of the pod – or, more accurately, on the row of buttons below the display. “Oh no way,” he whispered.
Taylor, come on. I’m not a fucking mind reader.
“It’s got a hover mode! Fuck yes!” He pressed the button that would activate the pod’s hover mode, and held his breath as he waited for it to kick in. The pod rose up off the floor with a quiet humming sound and hovered in front of him, and he let his breath out in a sigh of relief. “It’s gonna suck some extra power from the generator, but I don’t think it’ll put too much of a dent in it.”
Are you heading back to the flight deck now?
“Yep. I’ll message you as soon as the captain’s safe and sound.”
They were the hardest words that Taylor had ever had to say. He’d been hoping for hours, ever since he’d woken up in the escape pod, that the entire crew had survived the crash – however remote a chance that might have been. Now, though, reality was crashing in on him.
He was alone, stranded on some nameless moon twelve light years and trillions of miles from home – and there was only one other person in the universe who knew where he was or what had happened.
Taylor, I am so sorry.
“It’s okay. Thought this was what might have happened.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “I…I don’t know what to do, Meredith. I don’t even know if I can keep going. They’re all gone. Every single one of them is gone, all except for me and Captain Aya.” He buried his face in his hands and let out a quiet, shuddery sigh, in an attempt to keep himself from breaking down completely. “Fucking hell. What the fuck am I going to do now?”
You’re going to keep moving. That’s what you’re going to do. You’re still alive, and so is your captain – let’s keep it that way, yeah? You can grieve later, but right now you need to keep moving.
“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.” He swiped a hand over his eyes and drew in a deep breath. “Okay. I’m gonna keep looking for the rear medkit. If nothing else that should help keep my mind off things.”
I know I’ve been saying this a lot, but good luck. Got my fingers crossed.
“Appreciate it,” he replied with a small smile, and resumed his search.
Not even ten minutes later, in a repeat of his earlier success in finding the distress beacon, he found something else he hadn’t been looking for.
“Okay. Time to play the good news slash bad news game again,” he said as he rocked back on his heels and stared at his newest discovery – one that was so much better than a medkit any day. “You’re never gonna believe this.”
Oh, I don’t know. Try me. A pause. I’ll probably regret it, but give me the bad news first.
“I couldn’t find the medkit. Got into its cabinet easy enough, but the medkit wasn’t in there.”
Damn it.
“Yeah. I’m thinking someone took it out before the crash but forgot to put it back when they were done with it. So it’s probably still around here somewhere.” He squinted a little, thinking. “So it’s part bad news, part good news?” he hedged.
What’s the good news?
“Turns out that the Varia had two medical stasis pods on board. One of them’s a heap of scrap metal and therefore is zero use to me, so that’s more bad news, but the good news is that other one is still intact.” Here he grinned, once again not caring that Meredith couldn’t see it. “And all its functions have a green light!”
And you know this HOW, exactly?
His grin got bigger. “Found a portable generator.”
No way!
“Oh yes. It’s small, but it’ll keep the stasis pod running for days. Pod isn’t going to heal the captain, but it’ll keep her stable. That’s all I care about right now.” After a second or two, he added, “I mean, what I really want is for her to wake up, but right now I’ll take what I can get.”
He rose up out of his crouch and studied the stasis pod. “This thing’s going to be a monumental pain in the ass to haul all the way back to the flight deck, though. Same with the generator. Pod just on its own is as long as I am tall. And I’m not exactly short, so that’s saying something.”
But at the same time moving the captain to the pod isn’t the best of ideas. You need to make sure she doesn’t lose any more blood than she has already, and that means she needs to stay put.
“Yeah. That’s a good point, actually.” He frowned, thinking. “I wonder…”
What are you thinking?
He didn’t answer at first, instead focusing all his attention on the LCD display on the front of the pod – or, more accurately, on the row of buttons below the display. “Oh no way,” he whispered.
Taylor, come on. I’m not a fucking mind reader.
“It’s got a hover mode! Fuck yes!” He pressed the button that would activate the pod’s hover mode, and held his breath as he waited for it to kick in. The pod rose up off the floor with a quiet humming sound and hovered in front of him, and he let his breath out in a sigh of relief. “It’s gonna suck some extra power from the generator, but I don’t think it’ll put too much of a dent in it.”
Are you heading back to the flight deck now?
“Yep. I’ll message you as soon as the captain’s safe and sound.”
It had been a long day – one of the longest in Meredith’s recent memory. Between helping Taylor survive alone on a barren, deserted moon halfway across the galaxy, her usual Thursday class and trying not to stress over the newest assignment that Dr. Adams had dumped on everyone that afternoon, she was well and truly worn out. At the forefront of her mind was a shower and sleep.
At least, that was her plan until Quinn fell into step beside her as she left the lecture theatre.
“He’s hanging in there,” Meredith replied. “Just barely, but he’s managing.”
Quinn studied Meredith for a little while. “You look so tired,” she commented.
“Thanks for that Captain Obvious, hadn’t noticed,” Meredith retorted.
Mercifully, Meredith thought, Quinn ignored this and instead offered a bright smile. “Come on, let’s go get coffee. I’m buying.”
Ever since the two of them had met on move-in day at the beginning of freshman year, and especially since they’d become friends, their shared favourite haunt had been the Starbucks near the Health Sciences complex. Quinn ordered their coffees – her mocha frappuccino, and Meredith’s caramel macchiato – and the two of them found an empty table near the front windows. Without a word Meredith unlocked her phone, still with her and Taylor’s chat history open, and slid it across to Quinn. She didn’t say a thing as Quinn scrolled slowly through the messages that had been pinging back and forth since that morning, only getting up to retrieve their coffees when Quinn’s name was called out. By the time she returned to their table, Quinn had finished reading and was sitting back in her seat, a pensive look on her face.
“His entire crew,” Quinn said at last, and Meredith nodded. “Jesus Christ…” She shook her head in seeming disbelief. “I can’t imagine going through that on my own. How has he not just gone and sat in a corner and given up?”
“He nearly did,” Meredith said between sips of her macchiato. “But you saw what I said to him.”
“You, Meredith West, are a goddamn saint,” Quinn said. She raised her frappuccino and saluted Meredith with it.
“I’m so not a saint.”
“Mere, you could have told him to fuck off. You could have ignored him and left him for someone else to help. But you didn’t. You had zero idea who he was, and you still helped him.”
“Still doesn’t make me a saint. It was the decent thing to do.”
Anything either of them might have said after this was interrupted by the chiming of Meredith’s phone, and a new message from Taylor.
She’s in, and the pod says she’s stable – blood loss is dangerous but not yet critical, and the pod’ll keep her other injuries from getting worse. Meredith could almost hear Taylor letting out a laugh of sheer relief with his next words. This seriously feels like a miracle.
That’s good to hear. Don’t go celebrating yet, though.
Yeah, yeah, of course not. Stable isn’t the same as healed. And I still need to figure out how I’m going to get us rescued so she can get some proper medical attention. I’m a science student, not a doctor. Only so much I can do.
You’re doing pretty well so far though.
Thanks. Now I need to figure out what I’m going to do with the rest of the crew. I mean, they’re just lying there – I can’t leave them like that. He was quiet for a few moments. I’m gonna head back to the other half of the ship. Taking the stasis pod and the generator with me – I’ll let you know when I get there.
“I wish there was more we could do to help him,” Quinn said as Taylor’s busy message flashed up on the screen. Meredith locked her phone before slipping it into a pocket.
“Yeah, me too,” Meredith agreed. “How would we help him, though? Beyond texting him, I mean.”
“Call NASA?” Quinn hedged.
“We’re not only not studying science, but we also have jack shit to do with the space program. They’d never believe us.”
“Find out who his professors are and get them to tell NASA or whoever what’s happened?”
“They wouldn’t believe us either.”
“Yeah, I suppose you’re right.” Quinn let out a quiet sigh. “This sucks so much.”
“You’re telling me.” Meredith checked her watch and quickly finished off the last of her macchiato. “It’s going to take him about half an hour to walk back to the rear half of his ship,” she said as she crumpled her cup up in her hand. “And I kind of want to get back home before my phone dies on me, just in case he checks in early. We should probably get going.”
“You really need a powerbank or something.” Quinn finished her own drink and took the lid off her cup to try and get at the last bits of whipped cream at the bottom. “Well, come on then. What were you thinking of grabbing for dinner?”
“Italian or something, I don’t know. I’ll think about it on the way back.”
They made it back to their residence hall on the northwest corner of campus just as the battery level of Meredith’s phone dropped to 5%. “Can you get me a Hawaiian pizza?” she asked as she found her phone’s charger and plugged it in. “I’ll pay you back.”
“Yeah, no worries. See you when I get back, yeah?”
Almost at the exact moment that Quinn left, Meredith’s phone lit up with a new message from Taylor. After an incredibly depressing hike across an apocalyptic, barren wasteland, we arrive once again at a crew quarters lacking its crew. My life is officially bad middle-school poetry.
“Must be pretty bad then.”
Actually, it’s more than bad now that I think about it. It’s fucking terrible.
Meredith let out a quiet chuckle. “What are you going to do now?”
Way I see it, I have two options – gravedigging, or exploring the ship. I’m kinda leaning toward the former right now, purely out of respect for the crew.
“Yeah, I think so too. Give yourself a bit of closure as well.”
Exactly. That will be a good thing, I think. Do you mind if I take a bit of private time while I bury them?
“No, not at all. Just check back in when you’re done, yeah? I want to make sure you’re okay.”
Yeah, of course I will. She could almost imagine Taylor squaring his shoulders after he’d sent that message. Well, here goes nothing.
By some stroke of luck there had been a shovel in what remained of the Varia’s cargo hold. It had made digging graves in the hard, rocky ground a lot easier than it might have been otherwise.
Taylor leaned on the shovel as he surveyed the mounds of sand, dirt and rock that lay before him. He had briefly contemplated digging one mass grave, but had immediately dismissed it – he had far too much respect for the crew for that. Instead, he’d dug five – one each for Trotter, Antoine, Colby and Adair, and a fifth behind their graves for the crew members that had been fused together. A weight had lifted right off his shoulders as he’d finished laying them to rest.
“I feel like I shouldn’t be as relieved as I am that it’s done,” he said into his communicator. “It’s like…almost disrespectful.”
Pretty sure that’s called closure.
“Yeah, you might be right there.” He took the shovel up one last time and drove its blade into the ground between Trotter and Colby’s graves, and picked up Captain Aya’s helmet from where it sat next to his feet. He was sure she wouldn’t have minded him borrowing it to use as part of a makeshift grave marker. “Time to keep exploring,” he said as he placed the helmet over the shovel’s handle. With one last look back at the graves of the crew, he headed into the rear of the ship.
Where are you headed now?
“Past the bunks. Galley and the lab are back there.” He stopped at the point where the corridor branched off. “The corridor to the galley is really scorched – there must have been one hell of a fire back there. I’m tempted to go that way first, to be honest. Lab’s where my rats are, and I’m kind of afraid of what I’ll find there. If the other humans didn’t make it, what chance do they have?”
When was the last time you had anything to eat?
“God, it would have been hours ago, like at least twelve. Since right before I went to bed at the very latest. Escape pod didn’t have any food or water in it, so I haven’t had a thing to eat or drink since I got here. And now that you mention it, I am pretty hungry.”
Head for the galley, then.
“Galley it is.” He did his best to ignore the corridor’s scorched walls, ceiling and floor as he headed through to the ship’s galley. The galley’s door was tightly closed, something he discovered as he attempted to slide it open. “Okay, the galley door is seriously stuck,” he said as he tried to push the door along its track. A piece of scrap metal lying on the floor nearby caught his eye, and he bent to pick it up. “Fortunately I’m not above bashing the shit out of it,” he added as he tossed the piece of scrap between his hands – it looked like a support strut. A chill went through him as he realised it resembled the one that had gone straight through the captain, and he shook it off. “Because really, just between you and me? I don’t think we’re getting our deposit back.”
No, definitely not.
“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” He gripped the piece of scrap with both hands and wedged one end into the tiny gap between the door and the corridor wall. “I’m gonna keep at this for a bit – it’s really my best bet for finding something to eat.” He started trying to lever the door open. “Come on you bastard, open up already…”
Ten minutes later, he was ready to admit defeat.
“Okay, I don’t want to say that this is impossible, because that’d sound like I’m exaggerating,” he said once he’d managed to catch his breath. “So let’s just say that getting into the galley is improbable.” He glared at the galley door from where he sat on the floor against the corridor wall, resisting the very strong impulse to flip it the bird. “Highly, highly improbable.”
He tipped his head back against the wall. “It’s starting to get late anyway. The sun – the star, rather, Tau Ceti,” he corrected himself, “it’s starting to get low on the horizon. I really need to start thinking about finding somewhere to sleep.”
Exactly how hungry are you?
“Absolutely fucking starving.”
I think you should keep trying. Maybe try pulling on it instead of bashing the shit out of it?
He stared at the little text display on his left wrist. “Are you fucking kidding me right now,” he said flatly.
You said you were fucking starving. If I was where you are I’d do everything I could to get in there.
“You really are a sucker for punishment, aren’t you? At least as long as it’s someone else going through it.” He eased himself up off the floor. “All right. Against my better judgement, I’ll take another swing at it.”
Rather than trying to lever it open, this time he took Meredith’s advice and started trying to pull the door back along its track. At first it stubbornly refused to move, so he adjusted his grip on the handle and pulled harder.
That did the trick. Slowly but surely the door began to slide open – every time it showed signs of sticking he planted his feet a little more firmly, adjusted his grip and pulled at it again. When it was just half a foot from being completely open, he did something potentially very stupid.
He yanked on the handle as hard as he could.
The worst pain he had ever felt erupted from his left shoulder as the joint dislocated, whiting his vision out completely, and he let out a scream so loud that it echoed through the corridor. Before he realised what he was doing, he slammed his left side against the wall and popped his shoulder back into its socket. “Ow, ow, ow,” he moaned as he slid down the wall, clutching his shoulder with his right hand. “Motherfucker that hurts…”
As he looked toward his left, though, elation managed to override the incredible amount of pain he was in, and he grinned.
The door was finally open.
I totally pulled my shoulder out of joint! And it was TOTALLY FUCKING WORTH IT!
Meredith paused in eating her pizza, a slice of Hawaiian frozen halfway between her mouth and the pizza box. “Did you get the door open?” she asked.
I GOT IT OPEN!
“Yes!” Meredith cheered and punched the air in triumph. “Did you pull on it like I said to?”
A bit too hard, but yep! I yanked the shit out of that motherfucker. Though I’m in an incredible amount of pain right now, like you wouldn’t BELIEVE.
“Please tell me you found something to eat.”
YEP. Am eating chili macaroni and drinking some bottled water. This chili mac is kinda nasty because I’ve got no way of heating it up, but honestly? Best thing I’ve eaten in a very long time.
“Oh, I bet. Your poor shoulder though.”
I popped it back into place, it’s okay. Hurts like a motherfucker though. He was quiet for a little while – Meredith figured he was probably eating. Chili mac will be gone soon, sadly, but that’s a problem for three-minutes-from-now Taylor.
“And at least now you can get into the galley without destroying your other shoulder.”
That is a very good point. So what do you think I should do now? Go check out the lab, or figure out where the hell I’m going to sleep?
“Do you think you can handle what you might find in the lab?”
Taylor was quiet again – this time for longer than a few minutes. I think so. I survived a spaceship crash, didn’t I?
“Brace yourself though, yeah? Just in case.”
I will. More quiet – Meredith figured he was concentrating on making his way to the lab. Okay, well, time for yet another round of good news slash bad news.
“I’m not sure I like the sound of that.”
The good news – all of my handwritten notes on the maze-running and food-seeking habits of Sprague Dawley rats in various gravities? Totally intact. You can tell my professors that they don’t have to worry this trip was all for nothing. I got what I was after.
“What’s the bad news?”
Their cage looks like someone sat on it. It’s half-crushed and all warped from the heat, and my rats are nowhere to be found. I’d really love to believe that they survived the crash and escaped into the ship’s ducts, and they’re going to start a little rat civilisation on this moon.
Meredith held up a hand and crossed her fingers, not caring a bit that Taylor couldn’t see it. “Crossing my fingers for that.”
Yeah, me too. I think I’ll leave my notes here. Who knows, in like a million generations they could end up as this moon’s sacred texts. And hey, in addition to a galley full of rations I’ve got a fallback stock of food pellets and a half-full water bottle.
“Let’s hope it doesn’t come down to you eating rat food.”
You and me both. Anyway, like I said earlier it’s getting really late. I need to start figuring out my next move. Namely, where the hell I’m going to sleep tonight.
Meredith could almost imagine Taylor climbing up on top of a counter and swinging his feet back and forth as he considered his next move. So. Stasis pod’s humming along nicely and keeping the captain alive and well – or alive, at the very least. But as long as I have the generator hooked up to the pod, I have no way of powering the distress beacon or the defence turret. I’m not all that worried about the turret, because I seriously doubt that there’s anything on this rock apart from me and the captain. So I don’t really have any need to defend myself. But at the same time, without the beacon nobody’s going to know that I’m here. Nobody’s going to know to rescue me.
“Don’t you dare unplug the stasis pod,” Meredith snapped.
I’m not gonna, don’t worry. Captain’s been through far too much for me to just let her die. Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to figure out how to get the beacon working. She could almost hear him let out a sigh. I swear that at least some part of me is pretty sure they picked the wrong science student for this mission, or that I picked the wrong ship. Either way, this HAS to be worth some bonus points on my final grade.
“You just got unlucky. That’s all.”
That’s one way of looking at it. Anyway. Tau Ceti is down now, and I gotta tell you – it’s darker than a goth or emo kid’s journal, and colder than the prom queen’s shoulder.
Meredith shivered a little. “Fuck that’s cold.”
Mmm-hmm. I have a couple of options here. One, I can stay in the wreckage. Except that since the ship’s without power, I have no way of resealing any of the doors I’ve managed to open. So while I’ll have a roof over my head, I’ll be completely exposed to the elements.
“Not liking that idea.”
Yeah, me neither. My other option is to go around to the rear of the ship and pitch a tent near the reactor engine.
Meredith did a small double-take at the last two words. “Reactor, as in a nuclear reactor?”
As in a nuclear reactor. Believe me, I’m not liking the idea much either. But it’s warm near the reactor, and if I sleep in the ship I’ll most likely freeze to death. And that’s WITH my IEVA suit and my helmet on. There was more quiet, during which Meredith took the opportunity to finish her slice of pizza. My suit sensor says the engine’s giving off about a hundred and fifty rads right now. I’m not precisely sure if that’d be enough to kill me while I’m sleeping or not, though. Could you find out for me?
“Yeah, of course I can. Gimme a few minutes.” She tapped out of the Lifeline app and into her text messages, and found her message history with Quinn. Is 150 rads of radiation enough to kill someone? she tapped out into a new message. Figure for about eight hours.
Quinn’s response came quickly. Taylor, right? I asked Ivy, and she said that he’ll be all right – that won’t be enough to roast him. Might cause a bit of radiation sickness but other than that it won’t do any lasting damage.
Thanks, she replied, and quickly switched back to the Lifeline app. “Taylor? You there?”
Yep, still here.
“Asked my roommate, and she asked one of her friends – you’ll be okay sleeping near the reactor.”
Okay, cool. Honestly, though? I’m REALLY nervous about this. I mean, you’ve gotten me through today so far – and this has without any shadow of a doubt been the worst day of my entire life. So as nervous as it’s making me, I’m going to trust you on this. Hopefully your roommate’s friend is right.
“You and me both.”
I guess I won’t know until I wake up in the morning. It was almost as if these words were accompanied by a particularly wry smile. Good night, Meredith. Here’s to a better tomorrow.
“‘Night, Taylor. Sleep well.”
The human was curled up inside a sleeping bag, fast asleep. They had taken their helmet off and left it sitting on the floor of the tent within their reach – something that was a grave mistake. If the creature had had hands, it would have rubbed them together in anticipation. Instead, it climbed up onto the human’s face and snaked a long tendril toward their mouth, and began worming itself inside.
Without warning, and without waking up, the human wrinkled their nose and batted at their face with a hand. The creature tumbled down to the floor of the tent and bounced a couple of times before coming to rest. Undeterred, it shook itself and began its climb anew, this time managing to get halfway inside the human’s mouth before being batted away again. Rather than try a third time, the creature instead gathered itself and headed back outside the way it had come in.
It would try again the next night. The human would join them soon enough. Of that, the creature had no doubt.